Friday, June 15, 2007

giving thanks...........

I lead a really lucky life. I am a young white American girl . I live in a free country with access to medicine, education,clean water and a thermostat that is usually set at 70 degrees. While some people wouldn't think those facts make me lucky, i know better.
I've one employed husband, 4 gorgeous, funny and happy kids, also with good health & free education. They don't think that makes them lucky, but again, i know better.
And my parents that are alive and kicking and care enough about me to call 40 times a week. This drives me crazy dad, and it's why i haven't told you i have caller ID, because i know it would hurt your feelings if you knew i was avoiding your calls, because yes dad, i know you know better.

Here's the problem. I don't see myself as lucky. In fact i live by the old adage, "if i didn't have bad luck, i would have no luck at all" and in fact i would consider that to be my mantra for at least 6 of the last 10 years.
And lets face it, some really bad things did happen over the course of the last 10 years. My baby was diagnosed with cancer. It sucked. It still sucks. But last week he turned 9! See, Dr. told me me to take him home and make him comfortable, but thank goodness i knew better.
And you believe me, there is not a day that goes by that i don't thank God, Heaven and Earth and kiss the very ground that he walks on that Sam is here with us, alive and well......but it took me reading this post, over at thisblog to see how lucky i really am.
But you see, she is lucky too. Lucky to have known her sweet angel boy, if only for a short moment here on this Earth.
But because of her and her poignant writing on what was surely the worst thing to ever happen to her, i have a new take on luck. Sometimes when life hands you what appears to be the worst luck of all, it is possible to find a moment, a morsel, a glimpse of peace. Of hope, of joy, or luck.
It was good luck that little Liam was able to stay around long enough to give his parents a peaceful passing. They got to hold him, know him and love him and to say goodbye. He was lucky to have them.
I know that i won't soon forget him and everytime something bad happens, i am going to try and find a little morsel, a moment or a glimpse of peace, hope, joy or luck.
Godspeed Liam.

1 comment:

Bunny said...

Well said. I have been reading about baby Liam ans was so moved by Kate's description of his passing. I love when she said that his soul is part of her again. Beautiful.

I, too, often have to slow down and really think about what matters. I have many so incredible things in my life, I need to stop and be thankful for them.